Happy Fasnacht Day! That happy day when I’d blow in after school, an oblivious cyclone, to find the air heavy with the scent of freshly-made doughnuts. I never knew when it would happen or understood the significance. All I knew is that I’d rush in one afternoon and my grandmother would be serving up heaven from an electric fryer.

Why fasnacht? When I asked, my grandmother had no answer. Or if she did, she didn’t bother to explain. She’d had to deal with so many “whys” from me. But go ahead and look it up on the internet.

A fasnacht – which we pronounced “fosh-knot” (you’ll also see it spelled fastnacht, faschnaut, or faschnacht) – is a fried doughnut made on Shrove Tuesday – or Fat Tuesday, if you prefer – the last day before Lent. Traditionally, the making of doughnuts was a way to clear out all the tasties a good Christian is not supposed to eat again until Easter. Be that as it may, one could use a good fast after so much fried lard!

Now THOSE were doughnuts. The closest I’ve been able to find out in the real world are Italian zeppoli. Not quite the same, but they share a similar, unhealthy, fried, powdered-sugary goodness. However, zeppoli, like fasnachts, can vary. A light and puffy zeppola would bear little resemblance to my grandmother’s fasnachts, which were always cakey.

I miss those doughnuts. My grandmother was an undistinguished cook, but boy could she make fasnachts.

During covid-19, it’s unlikely that I will be hitting the road today, in search of the ideal fasnacht. In any case, I think the safest bet in this area (Central Jersey) would be the farmers’ markets, which are generally only open on the weekends.

I would be appalled by some “authentic” Pennsylvania Dutch fasnachts, which look too soft and are served with butter and maple syrup. I need an austere fistful of stodgy dough that I can enjoy with a cup of coffee.

Music for fasnachts (announcing it on the radio requires a nimble mouth and nerves of steel): Robert Schumann’s “Faschingsschwank auf Wien” (“Carnival Jest from Vienna”):

Not my idea of a fasnacht:

https://www.webstaurantstore.com/blog/116/fastnacht-day.html

The many faces of the fasnacht:

https://lancasteronline.com/features/how-to-make-your-own-fasnachts-plus-readers-share-fasnacht-day-memories/article_87673992-6d45-11eb-9845-8b2d7db963f3.html

PHOTO: These best resemble my grandmother’s recipe